This week I spoke with the smart and financially savvy Emma Johnson, over at her blog WealthySingleMommy.com about the problem with adultery from a divorce attorney’s perspective. The gist: courts won’t compensate you for a broken heart.
When there is infidelity, settlements are all but impossible, rationale goes out the window, and contention runs higher than in other matrimonial dissolution cases.
One of the most difficult conversations I have with clients can be dealing with their expectations because of a cheating spouse. Divorce can be an emotionally devastating experience. Adultery can make it much worse. But at the end of the day clients need to realize that the courts will do little about the reasons WHY you are getting divorced. Letting go of that emotional hurt can help get you to a fair agreement and move forward with your life.
There are many things that can make a divorce case horrible: emotional or obsessive clients who were not emotionally or financially prepared for a divorce; domestic violence; vindictive spouses who just want to punish the other person; children who are caught in the middle and witness too much; and creative lawyer-ing that can involve many courts and run up the cost and time frame of the case.
This week I spoke to Woman’s Day about one of my worst divorce cases, it was a “perfect storm: everything that could go wrong did go wrong.” Of course some of the small details and names are changed to keep it confidential. Once my firm got involved, we ended up turning the tables and getting our client the best outcome.
My Divorce Word of the Day is: Comingle! The quick explanation? This word means you’ve combined your separate property with marital property. The result? You might have turned your separate stuff into marital stuff! I talk more about this here:
Regardless whether the couple’s antics signal true marital problems or are simply more publicity ploys, in my experience as a divorce lawyer signs are pointing to the perfect relationship storm. To be clear, I am a divorce attorney but I do not represent Kardashian or West and I’ve relied on news media reports of their relationship. Here are the top 5 reasons Kimye’s marriage might be headed for an epic breakdown (and how you can avoid their mistakes): Continue reading “Kim and Kanye: These 5 Things May Cause Their Marriage To Fail (& How To Avoid It!)”→
By all accounts, Madonna is entrenched in a custody battle over her 15-year old son Rocco Ritchie, who is refusing to leave his father’s home in the U.K. and return to Madge’s care in New York City. The pop icon’s lawyers filed a motion against dad Guy Ritchie in the New York Supreme Court for New York County and a hearing is set for early March before the Hon. Judge Deborah Kaplan, according to the court’s website.
Shana started sobbing: “He says he’s going to get custody of the kids if I ask for a divorce!” she wailed. She wasn’t the first mom who heard this threat from her soon-to-be-ex. But I’m always surprised when the threat resonates such fear. Here you are a perfectly good mom, quaking in your shoes because dad says he’s better than you. Why? I believe part of that fear comes from Mom-guilt: deep down you don’t think you are a good enough mother. Here is my take on mom-guilt and how to take charge of it and avoid the #1 custody mistake. Continue reading “Moms: Avoid This #1 Custody Mistake.”→
After blogging last week about some of the warning signs of a doomed relationship that ladies should not ignore, several gents have point out several relationship red flags that they failed to see until divorce was imminent. So men, here are the top three serious warning signs that you shouldn’t take her to alter (or you may end up in a nasty divorce later): Continue reading “Men: Three Warning Signs That The Relationship Is Doomed”→