Interview: Perspectives on Step-Parenting

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My crazy wonderful blended crew!

Building a blended family after a divorce can get complicated. Not only is becoming a step-parent a major emotional commitment but now add in the finances and the dynamics involved in supporting this new expanded family. As a step-parent myself, I know all about this difficult and wonderful journey.

I spoke with MassMutual about the financial concerns when tackling step-parenting. While some tips are obvious (eg. get life insurance), other ideas are more nuanced (consider creating a trust and updating your will).

The article addresses four things that new stepparents should do:

  • Decide how you and your new spouse will manage household finances.
  • Update beneficiaries on insurance policies, bank accounts, and brokerage accounts.
  • Secure or revise life and disability income insurance policies, if needed.
  • Learn how your changed situation will affect your taxes.

You can read the article here and discuss your step-parenting journey in the comments.

 

 

 

Podcast Interview: Co-Parenting ADHD Under Duress

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Penny Williams is a mom on a mission to guide and mentor parents raising kids with ADHD and/or autism. Parent of a son with ADHD and autism, Penny is the author of three award-winning books on parenting kids with ADHD. Penny is the current editor of ParentingADHDandAutism.com, Founder and Instructor for The Parenting ADHD & Autism Academy, and she also hosts the Parenting ADHD Podcast.

I talked with Penny about the difficulties of dealing with divorce and co-parenting kids with ADHD, especially when the parents don’t agree on ADHD treatment and parenting. There are ways to pre-plan for these parenting disagreements during the divorce process, as well as resources and recourse for resolution after.

Listen in on our discussion and leave your thoughts in the comments!

Podcast Interview: The Relationship Restaurant

Relationship Restaurant

Divorce often intersects with couples therapy. Many times my clients are just coming to new realizations about their marriage during couples counseling or have tried many times over to make it work. Two excellent therapists and certified coaches that I had the chance to speak with are Poppy and Geoff Spencer. Their work and their marriage — to each other — has been documented in their #1 bestselling book “One Billion Seconds: There’s Still Time to Discover Love.” This dynamic pair discussed a host of different issues when it comes to the realization that a divorce may be on the horizon on the podcast: The Relationship Restaurant. The podcast focus is on “a figurative place where you can feel comfortable and safe to explore your relationship questions and concerns, so you can create your very own heart healthy relationships.”

Poppy and Geoff Spencer
Poppy and Geoff Spencer

https://poppyandgeoff.com/e036-debunking-divorce/ 

Enjoy the Podcast? Leave your comments and let’s discuss!

Free event: Thursday at the Friars Club

This Thursday, Morghan Richardson will be discussing Prenups and Property issues at the famed Friars Club in Midtown. Joining will be Compass Real Estate Broker Elizabeth Schwartz. Free event but space is limited — RSVP here. Come join us from 6pm to 8pm for drinks and snacks.

 

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Divorce Is Not Revenge.

www.TheDivorceArtist.comA client that I’ll call “Tanya” had a problem. Her husband was not only sleeping with her best friend, but he ran up more than $35k in credit card debt to take his affair on a trip to Thailand. Tanya was humiliated and angry. “I have done everything for him and the kids while he’s been parading around his girlfriend — my best friend — behind my back!” she said. “He needs to pay for this; I want revenge.” Revenge. Payback. Vengeance. What better place than a divorce court to get revenge on your spouse, right?

But this was Tanya’s real problem: divorce is not revenge. And divorce court is absolutely not the place to seek retribution. Surprised? Here are my top 5 reasons why divorce is not the place to get revenge on your spouse: Continue reading “Divorce Is Not Revenge.”

Child-Support: Fair or Fail?

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Michael looked at me with a stunned glare. I re-ran the child support calculations again. After some (but not all) of his taxes were considered, the calculator showed the same number, 25% of his income for child support. “I knew I was going to pay; I just didn’t know it was going to be that much!”

Primary bread-winners repeat after me: you agreed to pay the bills during the marriage and you are stuck paying after the divorce.

Many times, the amount isn’t unfair, but rather the fact that you are forced to pay an ex-spouse (who probably gave you some emotional scars). And, on top of that, you have no ability to control how that money is spent (or if that money is even spent on the child — or her endless shoe collection).  Continue reading “Child-Support: Fair or Fail?”

This #1 Mistake Can Break Your Bank In Your Divorce

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Andy was desperate: he owed more than half a million dollars in back child support and his ex-wife was seeking enforcement, including a violation for failure to pay, which would land him in jail for up to six months. They had been divorced for about 10 years but at the time, he had agreed to pay through the nose.

“I felt bad,” he explained. “I was the one leaving the marriage, and at the time I was doing really well at work.” His feelings of guilt landed him with high payments and no assets (he gave her the house too). His payments became untenable when the economy soured and his job was cut.

This is called Divorce Guilt and it can plague the spouse who is seeking the divorce.   Continue reading “This #1 Mistake Can Break Your Bank In Your Divorce”