Category: Marital Finances

The #1 Secret Weapon And Surprising Best Friend In Your Divorce

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Meet your new BFF

Mark was confused: his wife was demanding their co-op apartment in the divorce, and he felt – deep in his heart – that she should have it. His friends and coworkers were telling him it was a bad deal to trade-off paying her “alimony” and give her the apartment. And so was I. When Mark came in for our next appointment, I showed him my number one secret weapon in divorce – and his new best friend: a calculator.

“When you break down the tax benefits to paying ‘alimony’ and look closely at avoiding capital gains in a sale of the home, you are losing,” I told Mark. And so did the calculator.

Once Mark and I factored in the costs of litigation (best-case and worst-case), and examined his investment and retirement accounts, he had a choice: would he give up $175k in exchange for a “quick” settlement? Finally, Mark saw the light and went to a CPA and a realtor to confirm our rough estimates. Continue reading “The #1 Secret Weapon And Surprising Best Friend In Your Divorce” →

Courts Tell Stay-at-Home-Moms to “Get to Work”

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Earlier this week, Financial blogger Emma Johnson — who writes at Wealthy Single Mommy (dot) com — and I discussed the continued, growing trend in New York City courts: judges telling stay-at-home-moms to “get back to work.”  As one judge said during a hearing last week: “Just because you were a care-taker for a time, doesn’t excuse you from supporting yourself.”  While some women are able to creatively navigate such a big transition, others fail miserably, ending up in low-paid jobs.  How can SAHMs protect themselves while still staying-home with their kids? Watch our discussion:

 

Continue reading “Courts Tell Stay-at-Home-Moms to “Get to Work”” →

FAQ Series: When Do I Get Support?; Can I Save My Marriage?; Next Steps

ReadingMy answers to commonly asked questions.  Keep in mind: this does not constitute legal advice about your specific case; and, I’m not your lawyer until you pay me.

1. At what point in the Divorce will I get Temporary Child Support, Maintenance (“Alimony”) and Counsel fees awarded? I need support! Continue reading “FAQ Series: When Do I Get Support?; Can I Save My Marriage?; Next Steps” →

True Story: How to Squirrel Away $5,000 to Get Out of a Horrible Marriage (And Get the Kids, House and Alimony)

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I know an amazing mother of four children. She is on her second marriage and this time, the marriage is extremely successful. She and her caring, supportive husband are both school teachers. They have two-year-old twins and a house with — literally — a white-picket fence around it. It wasn’t always this way.

I’ll call this woman “Anne.”

Anne’s ex-husband was an obsessive, controlling and verbally abusive police officer. He drank. He cheated. And when Anne protested, he threatened to use his job to take custody of their preschool-aged kids and make her life a living hell. He also threatened to use his position as the sole bread-winner to hire the best lawyer and steam-roll over her in court. Yet, rather than feeling trapped and overwhelmed, Anne seized control of the situation — by taking control of her finances.

But not in the way you might think.

Continue reading “True Story: How to Squirrel Away $5,000 to Get Out of a Horrible Marriage (And Get the Kids, House and Alimony)” →