Category: Men’s Issues

He Said/She Said: Should We Separate? Tips From a Marriage Counselor and Divorce Lawyer

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In our second installment of He Said/She Said on the Huffington Post, marriage counselor Aaron Anderson and I disagree about whether couples should have a trial separation: 

When it comes to test-driving a separation everyone has an opinion, but no one disagrees more than your marriage counselor and your divorce attorney. A trial separation is one of the most challenging decisions a couple can make when facing hard relationship problems. Couples often struggle with questions like “What will we tell the kids?,” “Is it healthy to try and stay in the same house?” and “What are the legal consequences if I move?”

With so many questions to address, Denver marriage counselor Aaron Anderson advises couples that it’s healthier to separate during the divorce but New York divorce attorney Morghan Richardson advises against a move-out. Here’s why in their latest he said/she said: Continue reading “He Said/She Said: Should We Separate? Tips From a Marriage Counselor and Divorce Lawyer” →

As featured on the Huffpo: My Top Five Things Dads Should Know Before Setting Foot in Court

huffpostWhat happens when an actively involved dad is faced with a nasty, contentious custody battle?

When I say “active dad,” we are talking about more than changing a few diapers: you attend to the emotional needs of your kids and are genuinely involved in caretaking, potty training, homework, and tantrums. You’re involved in a real, meaningful way, and you intend to continue that involvement.

Here are the top five things that active fathers should know before they set foot in a courtroom — or click here to join the discussion on the Huffington Post.

Continue reading “As featured on the Huffpo: My Top Five Things Dads Should Know Before Setting Foot in Court” →

He Said, She Said: Should We See a Marriage Counselor or Divorce Lawyer?

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A divorce lawyer and a marriage counselor walk into a bar… Sounds like the beginning of a joke. But your relationship problems are no laughing matter. You need information and perspective.

When faced with questions about whether to divorce or reconcile, where do you go for advice: a marriage counselor or a divorce lawyer? You want to know: “How do I know if my marriage is over?” “If I go  to counseling, how do I know if my spouse will really change?” or “If I go to an attorney, is my marriage over, or can we still reconcile?”

Marriage counselor Aaron Anderson and I discuss our different views on when to see a therapist or #divorcelawyer in a piece featured on the Huffington Post.

Continue reading “He Said, She Said: Should We See a Marriage Counselor or Divorce Lawyer?” →

The Huffington Post Featured: Don’t Let Divorce Guilt Break Your Bank

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My piece on primary male bread winners and divorce guilt has been taken up by The Huffington Post. Let’s have a discussion about the ramifications of divorce guilt in the comments here or on the HuffPo.

Andy was desperate: he owed more than half a million dollars in back child support and alimony and his ex-wife was seeking enforcement, including a violation for failure to pay, which would land him in jail for up to six months. They had been divorced for about 10 years and at the time, he agreed to pay through the nose.

“I felt bad,” he explained. “I was the one leaving the marriage, and at the time I was doing really well at work.” His guilt and a rushed desire to settle landed him with high payments and no assets (he gave her the house too). His payments became untenable when the economy soured and his job was cut.

This isn’t the only case where I’ve encountered this type of divorce guilt that can plague the male primary income earner — particularly when he’s the one seeking the divorce. Continue reading “The Huffington Post Featured: Don’t Let Divorce Guilt Break Your Bank” →