Let’s get this out of the way up front: every married woman should have at least $5,000 in a bank account that’s hers alone: full stop.
Now before anyone starts clutching pearls or calling this marital betrayal, let’s be clear:
I’m not saying the account has to be a secret (though for some women, it probably should be). And I’m certainly not suggesting you stop caring about your partner’s feelings, as healthy relationships are built on openness and mutual respect.
But having your own money is part of being an adult. It’s not about prepping for divorce (though we’ll get to that). It’s about independence, protection, and peace of mind.
Because here’s the reality: life happens. And life is messy.
What if he dies unexpectedly and the joint account gets frozen? It happens all the time.
What if the boiler explodes and floods the basement?
What if you need to help a sibling, cover an unexpected medical bill, or just buy something beautiful, without explaining every dime?
Money gives you options. And options are power.
Yes, your account might double as a “just in case” fund if the marriage doesn’t last. And let’s not pretend divorce is rare — if you live in the real world, you already know the stats. I’ve had countless women in my office with no access to funds, trapped in limbo while waiting months (or years) for court orders to come through. No money for a lawyer. No way to pay bills. No way to feed their kids.
Sure, a judge might order your husband to pay you back or issue support, but that takes time. And money. And strength.
Having your own account is a lifeline.
And here’s the kicker: most divorcing couples I see had financial setups where one spouse handled everything, while the other had no clue about their income, debt, or investments. Guess who gets burned?
No one walks into a marriage expecting it to end, just like no one expects to crash their minivan. But you buy car insurance, don’t you? This account is your insurance policy.
And if the idea of having your own account feels uncomfortable or worse, dangerous to bring up with your spouse — that’s the biggest red flag of all.
Because in a healthy marriage, financial autonomy shouldn’t feel like a threat.
Oh, and for the record? I suggest he have his own account, too. And odds are? He already does.
Morghan Leia Richardson is a divorce attorney, mediator, and partner at Tarter Krinsky & Drogin LLP in New York City. She’s also a divorced mom and a passionate advocate for women’s financial independence.
The Divorce Artist™️ 